sometimes i rear the ugliest side of me to you. i dont know why i do.
seems like you somehow have a way to make me throw up the most nastiest verbal vomit.
seems like you throw it back in my face somehow or rather.
seems like sometimes you started everything out of nothing.
sometimes i wish i could take it back. sometimes i wish it'll cut u deep.
sometimes i wish i was more patient with you. to understand you. to stop and put myself in your shoes before i react. before i yell
but there has to be a compromise. you're got to do the same too.
you dont trust. you dont know how much it hurts. it hurts till i've become numb and become so jaded-till a point it doesnt matter anymore and i've moved on and i dont care.
you've got to try to understand me, be more patient and put yourself in my shoes and see how it feels-
what im trying so hard to tell you for your own sake or my sake or someone else's sake, what i really want you to understand and see, why im doing what im doing. to trust me but u dont.
but you're so sturbborn, you refuse
you pull everyone down with you.
you add gloom and get everyone so worked up
i dont know why you make thing so difficult for yourself and everyone
it is fun that way?
does it give u a rush of joy that u somehow got someone on your side and all worked up? that somehow you're won a mini victory at tearing me down?
does that make u feel any better or more self righteoues about youself?


seems like we're in a never ending nasty cycle.
and im hoping for a better change so badly till im on the very brink
and hope is gone.
sometimes i feel that glimmer of hope that someday things will change. i hold it so tightly in my hands. somehow it seems to slip through my weary fingers.
again yet again.


i cant change you or your point of view. you are always in your comfort zone
and i'm always stepping out of mine to reach you. you gotta know
you've got to sacrifice sometimes.
give and take goes a long way


maybe all i need is just the little tact to deal with your silly acts